Oh the Conflict!

Several words--or words that mean basically the same thing as the several words--have been banned from my presence. I don't care if people say them when I'm not around, but for the time being, people cannot say within earshot the following:
huge
big
ginormous
wow
elephant
whale (or any other animal associate with largeness)
I just can't hear it anymore.
We had another Dr. appt this morning. All is going well. I'm really conflicted by this. The Mom side of me is happy that my Poppyseeds are tucked safely in their cocoon--developing and growing. I certainly don't want them born before they have a sure chance of survival--and I want them born in such a state that they will be discharged from the hospital the same day I am. I've had to leave a baby in the hospital before (for a couple nights), and it was horrible.
The pregnant side of me is ready for this to be over! Pressure on my kidneys, contractions, pills every six hours, 24/7 heartburn, etc. The skin on my stomach is starting to get superficial tears--"cat scratches" they call them. I was assured this is fairly normal and nothing to freak out about, but really!
I got the first of two steroid shots this morning. An effort to speed up lung development just in case Kynan and Kaci decide to make an earlier than needed appearance. I get the next one tomorrow.
I don't have a problem with needles--especially when I can watch the needle go in. I wasn't able to watch this one, but I kept wondering why when she told me, "get ready" I kept feeling painful poking, but not a needle stick. Finally I felt it and it burned a little. Heath was giggling the whole time. I said, "I don't know why you are laughing...I'm handling this better than you ever could." Heath doesn't do well with needles. Apparently, the needle wouldn't go in. The tip was probably a bit dull, but Heath said, "it doesn't look like it, but you have buns of steel!" Haha. It was really funny though.
Dwelling on the length of this pregnancy isn't helping me or anyone else, I know. I can't stop thinking about it though! I have always found it unfair that most women find out they are pregnant 2-3 months into it. I wish! Wouldn't it be nice to only have to know for 6 or 7 months?! I however, like many who suffer from infertility get to find out almost as soon as it happens. In this case, I knew I was pregnant less than 9 days in! So I have had to know about it the WHOLE time! It really makes it feel longer than it should. Not fair.
The best part about this morning? When I went into L&D for the shot, one of the nurses was cuddling a newborn. I mentioned that they had the best job in the world. I wish you could volunteer at hospitals to go to the nursery and love on the babies. I know some hospitals still allow that, but most don't. It would be great though! That is my kind of volunteering!